


Thick Skin and an Elastic Heart

by nievereina



Category: Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: Comfort, Family Loss, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-02-24
Updated: 2015-02-24
Packaged: 2018-03-14 21:14:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,013
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3425828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/nievereina/pseuds/nievereina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>She was alive – but everyone else was dead.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Thick Skin and an Elastic Heart

Christmas Day…  
She could hardly believe that yet another year had gone by. But then again, a part of her could. The days dragged by in a never ending cycle of routine: Get up, take a shower, eat a little breakfast, go to work, come home, read until she fell asleep…it was boring and predictable but it was comfortable.

It was just on days like this when she didn’t have to go to work that she was given time to think. Oh how she wished she could shut out those thoughts, those memories that seemed to engulf her on days like this. Ten years ago Christmas Day was a joyous time, surrounded by loved ones. The bright laughter of excited children would wake her far too early, and she would hear the familiar grumble come from the solid presence by her side as her husband rolled over and flung an arm over her.

Now there was no warmth to the sheets beside her and no indent in the pillow next to her head. Not a sound broke the silence and the familiar pang of loss and pain washed over her as she hugged the blankets to her chest, teeth clenched and eyes shut.

It had been almost 3 years since her life had fallen apart around her: First her husband, killed in duty, then her two youngest, kidnapped from their home and never seen again till their bodies had been found months later, unrecognizable in their state of decay. She thought she was broken then, though the face she put on for her daughters and oldest son was a brave one. But nothing could have prepared her for the losses yet to come. Barely a year after her youngest and two years ago to the day, the multicar pileup on the freeway cost her the lives of her remaining children and almost her own.

She could vividly remember the crash, the smell of fuel oil and burning flesh, the smoke that seared her lungs and the screams that now echoed in her nightmares. They had been stuck upside down and while the girls in the backseat had died instantly, Robb in the seat next to her had been trapped, shrapnel in his face and chest and she had watched him die slowly. She could still remember the way his breath gurgled in his chest as he choked on his own blood, the fear in his bright blue eyes serving only to remind her how young he still was despite his attempts at manhood. Then the light had gone out of those eyes and she screamed, not stopping until the paramedics found her and sedated her. Next thing she knew she was waking up in a hospital, bandages covering every inch of her body and tubes and wires connected to machines that hummed and beeped in the eerie quiet…

She was alive – but everyone else was dead.

A knock on the front door startled her out of her reverie and she jumped, the blankets dropping from her hands as she was brought back to reality. Brienne – there wasn’t anyone else it could be and she slowly got up from the bed and pulled on a bathrobe over her pajama clad figure. She knew the woman outside wouldn’t knock again and she was grateful for the patience as she made her way to the door, dark red hair falling messily around her shoulders.

The large blonde stood on the front step, face grave as it usually was when Catelyn opened the door to let her in. Part of her still lingering in the past, Cat couldn’t muster up her usual smile for the other woman and she merely beckoned her in, knowing Brienne would simply stand there if she didn’t.

She had met the woman in the hospital, both of them under the care of a psychiatrist until deemed mentally fit to venture back into the real world. The larger woman’s quiet simplicity spoke to Catelyn and in her she found a companion that would not pressure her to talk nor urge her to “move on”. Often the two of them wouldn’t speak at all and so it was now as Catelyn ushered her in and moved to make tea for the both of them. It wasn’t an awkward silence but as Cat handed the blonde her mug of tea, Brienne said bluntly,

“You’re thinking about them aren’t you?”

Catelyn sighed and stared down at her tea, stirring it slowly in her hand as she nodded. “It was all I could think about this morning. I keep seeing their faces, lined up in a row…”

There was nothing Brienne could say to this and she got up from where she sat across the room and moved to Catelyn’s side. She was not good at comforting people and she half wondered why she had even come. She couldn’t replace Catelyn’s family but she had wanted to show the older woman that she wasn’t alone, today of all days. She reached out a hand, hesitating before placing it awkwardly on the red head’s shoulder, hoping Cat understood the gesture. She seemed to for faint sigh escaped her lips and she reached up with her free hand, fingers clinging to the larger ones on her shoulder.

“I miss them,” she almost whispered, glancing up at the blonde towering above her, tense and quiet. “It isn’t going to get any easier is it?”

“No,” Brienne said firmly.

She wasn’t trying to hurt Catelyn even more, but she couldn’t offer false hope. All she could give was the truth and she was rewarded with the faint lift of Catelyn’s lips as she gave a tired smile at Brienne’s bluntness.

“Sit down Brienne,” she said, releasing the other woman’s hand and patting at the couch next to her. “Drink your tea before it goes cold.” Like an obedient child, Brienne did as she was told, hoping that by the time she left, those lines of pain and grief written about Catelyn’s eyes and lips would have smoothed just a little.

**Author's Note:**

> I just had a lot of Cat/Brienne feels that I needed to start writing about. Maybe there will be more chapters...who knows.


End file.
